Memories!

I know that my children are only almost 3, but it seems that so much has happened in their short little lives! We have lived in 3 different 'homes' and had so many changes!

The most recent move was not one that we chose, but looking back it was for the best. Tonight we had the chance to walk back into that house and visit with some a friend from our very first church as a married couple and his new wife. They were staying in our old home, the parsonage, and asked if it were not to awekward that we might come and talk for a while. So we dressed the kiddos (they were in their jammies) and headed out the door at 9:45 pm excited to see our friends, with little time to think of where we were going. I expected my daughter who remembers everything to remember our 'old house' since it was just 7 months ago and she remembers things from before that...but for some strange reason they didn't remember it. Maybe because our things were not in it, or because there was ALOT of stress for most of the time that we lived there....or just because they love their life and home so much now they do not need to think about the past at this point. Either way, I remember...

Everything was pretty much the same, just a few minor things had been done since we moved out 7 months ago (VERY MINOR) the carpet, paint, light fixtures, etc. were all the very same. Which maybe only made it easier to think, to think of the victories our son won while we lived there...to think of the mile stones our children acheived behind those four walls.

It was fun and tormenting all at the same time. I watched my son who was suppose to never walk jump down the stairs into the sunk-in living room tonight, the very stairs that were once a huge hurdle for him to the point they were a barrior. The very stairs that he first climbed after being told he wouldn't. And now tonight, those very stairs he was jumping off!

I saw knicks in the walls where our children's toys (specific incidents) bumped, and spots in the carpet where dirt from my plant was thrown while looking through the windows at us after the kids had locked us out!

I saw the very corner that I cried in just days before we were told we needed to leave, that corner was where I prayed and cried knowing that our time there was limited. The banister where my children used to try to squeeze their little cheeks through and look down over my husband and I on the couch...the details my husband put into the house to make it our home.

Yes, tonight brought back a slew of emotions and thoughts. But with all of those memories (and as far as the family part of it goes ~ happy memories) it still didn't hurt to walk away again. It didn't hurt the first time, nor did it hurt this time. I would guess that we will not be back in that house again...and I would also guess that if the church people really knew we were there they may not be too impressed. But I count it as a blessing from God.

First, we were able to catch up with someone who we (mostly my husband) spent many an hour talking to and I thought was such a great guy for making the decisions that he did. Meet his sweetheart of a wife, and have some great time of fellowship.

But second, God allowed me a 'rewind' button tonight. I was just telling my husband the other day that I didn't remember much about our children as babies. That isn't true, and God helped me see that tonight. The memories are tucked away back in my mind to pop up here and there with a trigger. I can have glimpses of that part of their lives here and there, but now...now I need to enjoy where they are a lock away more memories because we all know they grow up TOO fast!

I wouldn't change anything about our lives now, (except for a little bit larger home for daycare & maybe having a baby or two ;) ) But really those things are up to God, not us, and our life is good. Most nights (5 or 6 a week) we have daddy/husband around where before we were lucky to get him one, our kids are happy, and we own our house. We have learned who are real friends are, and those friends are GREAT!

Thank you Lord, for the glimpse into the past...